Just another day

Kids selling roses in the streets,

Shops filled with “I love you” cards,

Couples walking too intimately on streets.

Hello, February. 

It was that month of the year,

The month that’s suppose to be of love,

A month waited by many, hated by some, dreaded by few.

4 years ago on this very day, she thought life was complete.

3 and half years later, they had both gone in their own ways.

They were friends nonetheless but it was different.

In the way, they both grew up.

They realized that they had different ideas and views on life.

Love still meant a lot but now she realized,

It was more about finding herself than about anything else.

The hype that people create around one day always seemed strange.

Because when you truly love someone,

Don’t you think it’s better to celebrate it everyday then just one day?

Why should there be one particular day for showing love?

She smiled when she thought bout it.

The doorbell rang and she walked towards the front door,

There it was, the familiar bouquet. It was from him.

Standing tall with the carnations,

There stood one rose with a note,

It said, “Not because it Valentines Day but because you love it”

She sighed. It looked the same but it was different this time.

A year ago although she didn’t want to admit,

She was happy to see it.

She was no anti-valentine person,

She just believed that we should love, respect and show it daily rather than one day.

They had always shared that thought but that didn't stop him from making it special for her.

A year ago, she would have been happy but

Today, it was just going to be about her and no one else.

Because its true when someone says that,

'Before anyone can love you, you need to love yourself.'

She picked up the bouquet, smelled the carnations,

And kept it on the side table.

She then sipped the red wine, 

Smiled and walked away.

This valentines, she will be her valentine. It will be a date with herself.

She will let her hair loose and go out with friends or watch a movie or snuggle up in the bed with a book.
She will not be bothered by the fuss created neither will she think bout why she is alone.
She will learn to love herself because she knows she deserves it.

Because man or no man, this day was just hers to be lived,

And no one could take it away or make her feel alone.

Because one day is never enough to show what 'LOVE' means and because cupid has to wait for a little longer for her before it strikes again...

When friends plunge into the wedding scene

I was dreaming a dream, a dream which seemed so real, when the phone rang. I came back to reality and received the call, it was my friend. We were friends since kindergarden and amidst all the problems, troubles, guy dramas and college, we still managed to keep in touch and remained really good friends. She seemed tensed, she seemed nervous. When I finally managed to come out of my sleepy mood and the wonderful dream, i asked her what happen and by the time she finished saying the three words, “I’m getting married”, all my sleep was gone and all my dreams were lost. No judgements but we were just 21!! We were still in our final years of graduation and had so much to see, so much to explore, learn and experience. I never knew she had a boyfriend so when I asked whom? The next bombshell dropped, “Arrange Marriage.”

I've always had this fantasy of wearing a vera wang white gown, having a wedding by the beach with 10 bridesmaid and a bridal shower abroad. It was all too a fantasy. We would all laugh out loud, talk bout our dreams, our wedding plans, our careers, the dream man, the dream house and none of it involved getting married at 21. I was of course happy for her and excited over getting wedding cards addressed to me, being a real part of the whole wedding ceremony, organizing bridal showers, hunting for the perfect wedding dress for her and helping her for her BIG day.  But i couldn't help asking "“Are you fine with it?” I knew some of my ex classmates were married and had children too but it was her, my close friend and I knew her well, she was just like me, career minded, independent and adamant about things that she wanted. 

And in all those excitement and rush, it struck me. The first question that I asked myself was “am i getting old or is she going fast?”, “am i in denial or is it because it’s her?", “am i jealous or am i scared of being the next one?”. Because just yesterday we were talking bout boyfriends and now it would be husband from her end, suddenly i felt so grown up and i didn't want to be that yet. Don’t get me wrong, I love weddings, I really do, I’ve always loved tagging along with my parents to weddings. Apart from the wedding dress and the wonderful decorations, the bride would always looks like the most beautiful girl of the world and i guess everyone of us has had that fantasy of walking down the aisle and looking really pretty. I had already imagined how my wedding would be, but it was just of that day, not after how things would be after the wedding.

Deep down, apart from wearing gorgeous gown and having a wonderful wedding ceremony, I’ve always been scared of wedding. What scares me is what happens once the fantasy, the dream is broken? Do we still love each other unconditionally? Do we actually follow “till death do us apart”? What if he doesn’t turn out to be my perfect man? What if I fall out of love? It’s all too silly but all this questions did come across my mind and suddenly I felt like the girl from 27 dresses, the one who helped organised many weddings but could never get married herself and boom, this made me feel worse. 


I know I’m not left out but I seriously begin to get those goose bumps when I hear that my friends are getting married or they have kids now, at this rate, i would be left with no one to whine about.

But then I realised, I am still 21, the world had lot to offer, I have a lot of things to learn and everyone has their own choices. Married or not, the bonds we shared would always remain and its upon us, to maintain that bond. With time, everything would fall into place and so instead of worrying bout the future, I should concentrate on my present and do things which I wouldn’t be able to do later. Of course, I would have my wedding some day too <once I get over my fear> but just not so soon. And when I do that, even after years later, I would have my loved one sitting next to me, sipping coffee and basking in the sunlight on a cold winter day. But until then, I will just be happy wearing the bridesmaid dress and giving the speeches and nah! I’m not next, there will be many more before me and frankly, I don’t mind waiting and maybe, just maybe its not so scary marrying someone, when we think bout the good things and the good moments and forget bout the “what ifs” and “what not's”.

Oh and in case your wondering about my friend, she had a wonderful wedding ceremony, she looked really pretty, she is very happy and the guys a gem! He keeps her really happy and well, what more does a girl want… of course besides, Prada, Louis Vuitton, Burberry, Harry Winston and on and on...

Men and Shoes

Men and shoes? That must have been the first reaction for most of you, well I actually never really thought about it too. But today as I was cleaning my shoe cabinet, I began analysing men with shoes.  What’s with men and shoes?? The common connection between them would of course be us, women!!

Women love shoes and it is fair to compare men with shoes. No, not because they are worn on feet <we obviously don’t treat men that way> we can just compare them with shoes because the right shoes are impossible to find just like the right men. Sometimes if we like the colour, we don’t like the style, sometimes the heels too high, sometimes its too flat, sometimes it pricks you, sometimes it just doesn’t look right. Some looks better on someone else and the ones we really like? well they either doesn’t fit us well or doesn’t look good on us.

Don’t you hate it when you see a really nice pair of shoes and you don’t find the size for you? Or if it’s too costly? Don’t you hate it when you meet a really nice guy and he turns out to be a jerk? Or he doesn’t feel the same way about you? So the question is, are men actually like shoes??

I heard a song the other day it went something like this, “Men are like shoes, there just too many, they confuse us and we don’t know which one to choose”

Women owns so many shoes and theres still so many more to choose from but all shoes don't fit everywhere. There is a shoe for every occassion. We wear some to restaurants, some to walks, some for shopping, some give us confidence and some we  wear when we want to feel pretty and then there’s this perfect pair of shoes where you can wear almost everywhere and you feel so comfortable that you don’t even mind wearing it over and over again.

In this way, when we see men, we like some, we flirt with some, we date with some and some we feel is the right one for us, while with some you just don’t feel right!!!

Some shoes look so pretty but when we put it on, we realise that it’s uncomfortable,

Some shoes we realise look better on someone else rather than us,

Some we just buy and don’t wear it.

And when we finally find the right one, we forget about all the trouble that we went through for the right shoe. We forget the broken heels, the tight shoes, the loose ones, the shoe bites. We forget everything because now we know that no matter what, this right shoe would take you to the right places.

Isn't that the same with men? like shoes, some men can’t be fixed, some just needs a shine, and some just hurts you but some stays with you forever and when he does, we forget the past.

Maybe if we start taking things this way, we would realise that all men, like all shoes are different too and unless you have tried each and every shoe, you can never really judge or classify them. But how many right ones do we actually have to experience till we find THE one???

I love shoes, I have lots of them but I only have one perfect shoe. It’s a black strap stiletto 4 inch heel which I can wear for dates, partying or dinners. I still remember the day I bought it. I was out shopping and I was looking for a pair of heels for a party, I knew I wanted black but I didn’t know whether I wanted kitten, pump, block, or wedge. Stiletto was not even in my option but when I saw it I knew this was it, this was the right one. I entered the shop with so many questions on my mind, “will it fit me right?”, “will I be comfortable?”, “will it be affordable”, “will it look pretty on me” etc, etc. but when I tried it on, I knew I had found my perfect pair of shoes and at that moment I forgot the long hours of heat, the endless search and even the “oh too many shoes” that I tried.

Its been one year since I bought that pair of shoes, some may not like it, some may find it uncomfortable but for me, its just fits right and today even after so many shoes, it still remains the right one for me and I hope that just like my perfect shoe, I would find my perfect men too, not too loose, not too tight, with the right blend for my style, someone who just fits right into my life and someone who is going to make me forget bout all the past "right ones". But until then, i am going to go out and shop for more shoes !! ;)